Big Tiny Steps

(At ~37.5% of full dosage, and 20 days after starting the Bright Mind natural Adderall alternative)

OK, so even though I went to bed last last night and woke up early this morning, before my alarm clock went off, like more than an hour and a half before it went off (although I drifted in and hour of sleep until it finally went off), and although I am of course exhausted like I was yesterday when I decided to postpone my next reduction in dosage…

I have decided to not delay any further, and jumped down to 1.5 tablets (started at 4 tablets).

So I am below the 50% dosage mark as of this morning.

And sure, I may feel very tired today, but I am keeping in mind that:

a) Feeling sleepy is not the end of the world, and I am blessed with a job that’s flexible enough to where I can take a nap if needed.
b) Sleepiness is much better and less disruptive than actual withdrawals like headaches, nausea, psychological symptoms, etc.
c) I have Bright Mind to help if necessary

Bright Mind to the Rescue

That’s right. Yesterday later in the afternoon, I was SERIOUSLY dragging and not able to take a good nap, so I took that 2nd dose of Bright Mind, and it not only woke me up, but put me in an Adderall-like state of mind.

So although I don’t want to make taking a 2nd dose in the afternoon a habit (shit’s expensive and I don’t want to build a tolerance), it’s good to know that I have that option.

That said, I will try to always attempt a nap first, but that’s not always possible or effective enough. So it’s good to know I have Bright Mind in my back pocket.

A Milestone to Celebrate

So this is a big step, getting below 50%. I will have to think of a way to celebrate, perhaps without sugar/sweets though. This addiction to sugar definitely makes me feel bad, and I don’t want to rely on food to celebrate victories, so I will think of some way to celebrate this milestone, even if it’s something small and simple. Maybe giving myself some extra time to do something fun that brings me excitement like music or creating a silly video edit.

The point is, I am well on my way. I’ve had plenty of chances to retreat, yet, I have no desire to go backwards.

Also, this blog, which virtually nobody may ever read, has been a tremendous accountablity tool, and I don’t know how well I would have done without it.

So anyone going through this same thing, consider memorializing your journey with a blog like this one. I am using WordPress.com’s free plan because bells and whistles and monitzation has nothing to do with the purpose of what I am doing here, so this journal has not cost me a red penny, FYI and FWIW. :)